Passion, Children (FINAL COPY)

When I asked why he was blue, they made me leave.

I wasn’t asking to be silly, and I wasn’t asking because I was morbidly curious.

I was asking because I felt an explosive need to protect him. Sure, he was slimy, he was shrill, and he would be the bane of my teenage years, but, in the moment he took his first screeching breath, I felt an unconditional love for him, and the millions of children he represented.

Keller was born a healthy baby, but, despite the doctor’s reassurances, I thought that he would break at any moment- he was just so small, fragile, and helpless. As he grew, I grew with him. Having never been surrounded by children (I was an only child, and the youngest in my extended family), I had always viewed them as a nuisance. But, through Keller, I came to realize the extent of a child’s innocence and defenselessness. I had stopped thinking of them as annoying, and began thinking of them as precious and something to be valued. I felt an unexplainable desire to watch over and protect every child who was born into damaging circumstances.

1. This is a recent photo of Keller- there's such life and excitement etched in his face. The idea that there are thousands of kids around the world who do not know this joy breaks my heart.

It was like a wolf had been asleep in my soul for 15 years, was woken by my brother’s piercing cries, and is now howling for action. There is no longer a vague sense of detached compassion within me. Before my brother’s birth I had assigned myself to multiple causes (global warming, nuclear warfare, the death penalty), because I needed to belong to something that reminded me my suffering wasn’t comparable to the plight of thousands around the world; despite this desperate need to belong, I never really felt passion for these causes. I never felt that my individual crusade to stop these events from happening would have had any long-term, lasting effects. I knew that trying to effect change in issues like halting nuclear proliferation would help no one. No matter how many protests I attend, petitions I sign, and letters I write, countries will continue to advance their nuclear arsenal.

However, now there is a fierce passion within me that recognizes childhood as an unalienable right. Reading about children who are forced to suffer from the actions of adults, theoretically their guardians, enrages me. Children should not have their innocence crudely snatched away. They should not have to be fatalities of war- whether they are being forced into military service or victims of persecution and genocide. They should not be trafficked for sex or labor, and they should not have to live with diseases like HIV. They should not have to confront poverty, starvation, or abuse, and they should not have to seek answers to questions that are beyond them.

2. A drawing by a child solider

My brother has only cried from fear once, and it was because he saw me hysterically screaming about a cockroach in my hair. The confusion and terror on his face was enough to ensure I never overreacted in his presence again. I cannot imagine a child his age living in a war zone, surrounded by death. Who comforts them when their parents disappear? Who soothes their terror? Who explains what it all means to them?

3. This photo was taken on Christmas two years ago. Keller was crying because my mom was opening one of his boxes. Though his tears are a result of a temper tantrum, I can’t help but think of this face when I read about children living in disadvantageous circumstances.

However, what differentiates my devotion to children’s causes and the ones mentioned above isn’t the degree of fervor I feel for them, but it’s the hope that children’s causes inspire in me. Stephen Covey says, passion is “the fire, the desire, the strength of conviction and the drive that sustains the discipline to achieve the vision” [1] . I think the later part of this quote is referring to hope. For example, regardless of which children’s cause I champion, I can effect change on a communal, state, national, and international level. Whether I am touching one life or hundreds, I am comforted by the thought that children represent a new generation. And, even if I cannot tangibly change the world for everyone, at least I can help make a better tomorrow for some children.

However, to say I’m championing children’s causes would be to assign myself to very general tasks. As I mentioned before, there are a lot of children’s issues one can dedicate oneself to, and, from my experience working with Amnesty International, I know it can be overwhelming and discouraging to attempt to tackle all of the issues. So, as of today (I say this because my future changes daily), I’ve chosen to pursue an avenue that allows me to entertain two of my passions: children and microbiology.

According to The United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) there are “over 2.5 million children infected with HIV” [2] (90% of them from Sub-Saharan Africa) [3] , 420,000 more children are infected yearly [4], and “15 million children under 18 have lost one or both parents to” Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS) [5]. By dedicating myself to AIDS research I can help save the lives of thousands of innocent children who are forced to live with this painful and terrifying disease.

4. Microbiology is essentially the study of microbes (viruses, bacteria, fungus, and protozoa). AIDS is a virus.

Most children who are diagnosed with HIV where infected in one of two ways. First, they may have gotten it from their infected mother through her blood or breast milk [6]. UNICEF is currently working on a Prevention of Mother to Child Transmission Project (PMCT) which sets up a 4 tier system for communities. The first tier works with community structures to spread awareness of MTCT (mother to child transmission). The second tier provides counseling to women who are infected with HIV, so they can make informed decisions about their future reproductive life. The third tier works on coaching infected mothers on how not to pass the virus along to their children; it demands HIV testing be available in all healthcare units that provide antiretroviral drugs. The fourth tier calls for better integration of HIV care in rural, underdeveloped countries, for only ten percent of infected, pregnant women are utilizing UNICEF’s PMCT [7].

5."A woman, who is HIV-positive, lies next to her newborn child in V.V. Hospital, in Bangalore. The HIV status of her newborn is not known." – UNICEF

The second way HIV is transmitted to children is through rape. There is a prominent belief in Africa that sex with a virgin- specifically a baby or a child- can “cure” HIV. According to worldnetdaily.com children are the victims of 41% of reported rapes in Africa. Moreover, it is believed that a large percentage of sexual abuse goes unreported [8].

I find it the greatest injustice that children who die from AIDS, particularly the ones who don’t have access to antiretroviral medication, are never given a chance to live and overcome the trials of their circumstances. By dedicating my life’s work to AIDS I know I can help alleviate the suffering of the thousands of children afflicted by this virus. Whether I’m in the lab working on a cure, part of a non-profit marketing team promoting awareness, or serving as a counselor in a remote Congolese village, I know that the hope my passions inspire in me will be a driving force behind my contribution to tomorrow’s generation.

Three years ago I felt a certain detachment when it came to the world: it wasn’t that I didn’t care, or that I didn’t want to work for a greater cause, rather I didn’t know what the right cause was.

However, Keller has given me an insight into the world of children’s causes, which has inspired me to, in the words of Joseph Campell, “follow (my) bliss, and (not) be afraid.”

6. Though this video doesn’t relate directly to children with AIDS, it captures the essence of my passion: helping protect children.

[1] Stephen R. Covey, The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness. (New York: Free Press, n.d.), 47.
[2] UNICEF, “Children and HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index.php.
[3] UNICEF, “Preventing Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT) of HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html.
[4] UNICEF, “Children and HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index.php.[1] UNICEF, “Preventing Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT) of HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html. [5] UNICEF, “Preventing Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT) of HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html.
[6] UNICEF, “Preventing Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT) of HIV”, http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html. [7] Anthony C. LoBaido, “Child-rape epidemic in South Africa: Fueled by widespread belief that sex with virgin cures AIDS”, December 26, 2001, http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=25806.

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS:
1. Personal Photo
2. http://www.amnestyusa.org/child_soldiers/gallery.html
3. Personal Photo
4. http://pro.corbis.com/search/searchFrame.aspx
5. http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html6. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwDy-mEJ3mUKI

ROUGH DRAFT: Passion, Children

When I asked why he was blue, they made me leave.

I wasn’t asking to be silly, and I wasn’t asking because I was morbidly curious.

I was asking because I felt an explosive need to protect him. Sure, he was slimy, he was shrill, and he would be the bane of my teenage years, but, in the moment he took his first screeching breath, I felt an unconditional love for him, and the millions of children he represented.

Keller was born a health baby, but, despite the doctor’s reassurances, I thought that he would break at any moment- he was just so small, fragile, and helpless. As he grew, I grew with him. I began to realize the extent of children’s innocence and defenselessness, and I felt an unexplainable desire to watch over and protect every child who was born into damaging circumstances.

This is a recent photo of Keller- there's such life and excitment etched in his face. The idea that there are thousands of kids around the world who do not know this joy breaks my heart.

It was like a wolf had been asleep in my soul for 15 years, was woken by my brother’s piercing cries, and is now howling for action. There is no longer a vague sense of detached compassion within me- there is a fierce passion that recognized childhood as a moment in time we were all entitled to. Thinking about children who are forced to pay for the actions of adults that are supposed to protect them enrages me. Children should not have their innocence crudely snatched away. They should not have to be fatalities of war- whether they are being forced into military service or victims of persecution and genocide. They should not be trafficked for sex or labor, and they should not have to live with diseases like HIV. They should not have to confront poverty, starvation, or abuse, and they should not have to seek answers to questions that are beyond them.

A drawing by a child soilder

Aside from children’s causes, I feel passionately about a lot of things - global warming, nuclear warfare, and the death penalty. However, I don’t feel that my individual crusade to stop these events from happening will have any long-term, lasting effects. I will have spent my entire life battling through corruption and bureaucracy only to end up right where I started. Trying to effect change in issues like halting nuclear proliferation would help no one. No matter how many protests I attended, petitions I signed, and letters I wrote countries would continue to advance their nuclear arsenal. There is no light at the end of the tunnel where these issues are concerned.

However, what differentiates my passion for children’s causes and the ones mentioned above isn’t the degree of passion I feel for them, but it’s the hope that children’s causes inspire in me. Stephen Covey says, passion is “the fire, the desire, the strength of conviction and the drive that sustains the discipline to achieve the vision”. However, I think the later part of this quote is referring to hope. For example, regardless of which children’s cause I champion, I can effect change on a communal, state, national, and international level. Whether I am touching one life or hundreds, I am comforted by the thought that children represent a new generation. And, even if I cannot tangibly change the world for everyone, at least I can help make a better tomorrow for some children.

However, to say I’m championing children’s causes is assigning myself to very general tasks. As I mentioned before, there are a lot of children’s issues one can dedicate themselves to, and, from my experience working with Amnesty International, I know it can be overwhelming and discouraging to try and tackle all of the issues. So, as of today (I say this because my future changes daily), I’ve chosen to pursue an avenue that allows me to entertain two of my passions: children and microbiology. According to The United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) there are “over 2.5 million children infected with HIV” (90% of them from Sub-Saharan Africa) , and 420,000 more children are infected yearly . By dedicating myself to the research of Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome (AIDS) I can help save the lives of thousands of innocent children who are forced to live with this painful and terrifying disease. Most children who are diagnosed with HIV where infected in one of two ways.

First, they may have gotten it from their infected mother through her blood or breast milk. UNICEF is currently working on a Prevention of Mother to Child Transmission Project (PMCT) which sets up a 4 tier system for communities. The first tier works with community structures to spread awareness of MTCT (mother to child transmission). The second tier provides counseling to women who are infected with HIV, and the third tier works on coaching infected mothers on how not to pass the virus along to their children. The fourth tier calls for better integration of HIV care in rural, underdeveloped countries.

"A woman who is HIV-positive, lies next to her newborn child in V.V. Hospital, in Bangalore. The HIV status of her newborn is not known." - UNICEF

The second way HIV is transmitted to children is through rape. There is a prominent belief in Africa that sex with a virgin- specifically a baby or a child- can “cure” HIV. According to worldnetdaily.com children are the victims of 41% of reported rapes in Africa. Moreover, It is believed that a large percentage of sexual abuse go unreported.

By dedicating my life’s work to AIDS (whether I’m working on a cure, promoting awareness, or serving as a counselor) I know I can help thousands of children. I find it one of the greatest injustices that children who die from AIDS, particularly the one’s who don’t have access to medication, are never given a chance to live and overcome the trials of their circumstances.

Three years ago I felt a certain detachment when it came to the world. It wasn’t that I didn’t care, or that I didn’t want to work for a greater cause, rather it was just that I didn’t know what the right cause was. However, Keller has given me an insight into the world of children’s causes as Joseph Campell advises, I am going “to follow (my) bliss, and (not) be afraid”.


The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness, Stephen R. Covey
http://www.unicef.org/aids/index_preventionyoung.html
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=25806
Your Personal Vision

Who am I? Why am I here?

Who am I? Why am I here?
I’m a girl who doesn’t know who she is. I am a girl who doesn’t know why she is

here.

This is part of an old Facebook Rant…

I feel quite alone in my uncertainty- everywhere I turn I hear people declaring majors, missions, and purposes. They’re joining sororities and clubs, applying for jobs and internships- they’ve got a fall back plan for their fall back plan! They’ve got their treasure map of success, and they’re all sprinting full force towards the big, red X. But, when do I get to join the hunt? When do I get to feel that sense of belonging? Is there a club for people who don’t know what they want from life? If there is can I join the e-list?

So the rant is a bit winey, but I was feeling winy at the time…

However, it’s relevant because when I sat down to read the assigned anthology readings I came across this quote, “though they cannot pursue every subject which is open to them, they will be the gainers by living among those and under those who represent the whole circle” ( Newman 309).

Though this portion of Discourse 5 didn’t inspire a great sense of community in me, it did help me recognize a common denominator among most UT students- a love for learning. And, though this seems like an obvious stipulation for most college bound people, it never occurred to me that I am apart of such a vast community of intellects. Nearly everywhere I go I encounter one prevalent theme- passion for learning and exploration. It’s beautiful, really it is.

REVISED
Who am I? Why am I here?
I am a girl who wants to learn about EVERYTHING.

Except for math…

A HUGE library, where I could read about EVERYTHING!

UT has set a precedence of equipping students with the best education so they can give back to their community (community can be defined as local, state, national, or international). Our insignia is inscribed with, “Disciplina Praesidium Civitatis” which translates directly to “cultivated mind is the guardian genius of democracy” (X305). Though democracy is narrow in scope, this inscription still upholds UT’s standard of “community service”, another uniting force among UT students. Though we may define our community by different demographic and geographic areas, most UT students strive to be give back to that community, by being apart of something bigger.

REVISED
Who am I? Why am I here?
I am a girl who wants to be a part of something bigger, but doesn’t know how. I am a girl who wants meaning-

WHERE IS MY MEANING?! WHAT DOES MEANING FEEL LIKE?!

Me contributing to world peace = meaning!

So, my facebook rant still stands. While it’s hard to not feel desperate about my future, I realize I don’t need to feel so alienated from other UT students (particularly those who know what they want to do), for most of us share two common interests that bind us as a community: a love for learning, and a need to be apart of something larger.

Alice in Wonderland

Part of me thinks it’d be easier to give a review of the tangible theatrics I enjoyed most- great costumes, good acting (I liked Fiona Rene’s Caterpillar best), catchy songs (though, I thought I recognized something from the Jungle Book) but another part wants to share my epiphany (albeit slightly noob-ish) with everyone.

To begin with- Alice in Wonderland is Fantastic. You know when you’re watching those movies, and they just really hit your core? They make you step back, take a look around, and just sigh… That’s what this play was like for me. I know it sounds silly, but when the play had ended, I felt truly moved. It was like someone had taken all my confusion, paranoia, and fear and explained it in a silly, child-like way. From the first scene on, I began drawing parallels between my life and Alice’s.

For example, when Alice was trying to get through the door she kept “messing up”, and, like The Duchess said, there was a moral to her experience. If one messes up, one must keep on trying until they get it right. I expect such perfection from myself that, when I make mistakes (which seem to happen more often than not) I can’t move past it. I become so discouraged that I give up, for I’d rather limit the humiliation than potentially prolong the disappointment and fear. But that’s not the way to handle things. Alice had it right! She couldn’t just stay a giant. She needed- no, she wanted to go somewhere, so she was going to go. And, even though she wasn’t the perfect size, even though things hadn’t worked out the way she had planned, she still got through the door.

It sounds silly to say this, but I’ve been so caught up in the stress of this transition, that I’ve completely lost sight of my spirit and, more importantly, my common sense. Even if The City Theatre had put on an awful production, I would still give the play five stars just because it was one of those experiences that helped me take a step back and breathe- it was one of those moments that helped me appreciate the infinite possibilities of life.

Though there were particular moments that stand out in my head- when Alice asked the Caterpillar where to go- the duet between the Cook and the Duchess was one of my favorite scenes. They reminded me of what I really want from my experience at UT.

It’s a weird connection, but stay with me.

Their song was about growing older, appreciating the potential of your youth. However, I feel like the entire time I’ve been here, I’ve taking my potential for granted. I’ve been so lost in my financial, academic, and social stresses that I’ve forgotten what “life” really means to b e. It’s not to have some big shot career, it’s not about makeing 8 figures, it’s just about living- to know the very essence of my existence, to know love and truth in it’s purest and most passionate forms.

I know this is a very unconventional review, but I swear it originally had a lot more structure (I deleted the first half so it wouldn’t be so long). However, I am submitting this as my “formal” review of Alice in Wonderland, because I think the feeling behind the experience is really a lot more important than the actual aesthetics of the experience.


It was a FANTASTIC play, and you really don’t want me to say what you already know.

Wear Sunscreen

This video needs no introduction...




EVERYONE IS FREE TO WEAR SUNSCREEN, Baz Luhrmann

Here is a link to the lyrics: http://www.lyricscrawler.com/song/3953.html

FEEL your FEELINGS

We live in the midst of a great contradiction. Technologically and intellectually we have been growing exponentially, but, at the same time, the world around us has been decaying. Whether we’re talking about global warming, health care, conflict in the middle east, nuclear weapons, or morality in politics, there has always been an unsure, unstable future surrounding man kind.

This atmosphere of instability has bred a culture of competitiveness (in the form of self preservation) that permeates everything we do. Security, one of the four basic needs and motivations of all people, is primarily a left hemispheric function, for it requires us to be more logical, calculated, analytical, and time oriented. This is particularly evident if you consider the role this portion of our brain has played in the past four years of most Plan II students’ lives (i.e. academic competitiveness and preparation for professional security).

This competitive culture means we haven’t been able to completely tune in to the potential of the right side of our brain, and, as a result, we’re missing out on a fundamental, raw human experience. In other words, the right side of our brain enables us to explore our emotional and spiritual spectrums, and, by exploring these spectrums, we “discern true principles that are part of our conscience” (X43).

Consider Covey’s experiment with his students- “the dominant, central theme of their activities, the underlying principle, (was) love” (132). His students most likely always loved their parents, but when they changed their perspectives, when they began thinking with the right side of their brain, the idea of love become something completely new to them. They were able to lead a fundamentally different and more enriching life, because instead of simply acknowledging something like love, they felt the love for their family!

My mom and my brother, the perfect example of FEELING love

Which leads me to question when was the last time you or I really FELT compassion? When was the last time we did the right thing, because we FELT it was the right thing, not because we knew it was?

I say people who think predominately with the left side of their brain are missing out on the raw human experience, because, not to sound melodramatic, what’s the point of being human if we don’t allow ourselves to respond in the way ONLY humans are capable of responding. After all, “our capacity to act on our thoughts and feelings, and to make things happen is unmatched by any other species in the world” (X42).

"Don't Lose Touch", Against Me

As for the debate on whether the Internet encourages or discourages the use of our right hemisphere, I agree with Bump’s assertion in Left vs. Right Side of the Brain: Hypermedia and the New Puritanism-- “hypermedia can facilitate as well as retard emotional intelligence”. Most people react differently to the situations/experiences they are exposed to, and-- to refer back to my original argument – their specific reactions are dependent on their environments and experiences. For example, one may only use the Internet to pay bills, order pizza, and surf ebay, while someone else (me, for example?) may only uses the Internet to surf youtube, look at pictures on corbis, and read blogs. I would argue that the former only encourages the use of your left brain (one isn’t being exposed to much creativity). While the latter primarily encourages the use of one’s left brain (watching and looking at people’s creations, reading about their feelings).

----

I found the video visually entertaining and amusing.It was thorough and honest in its presentation- I liked how it touched on the positive and negative sides of the Internet.However, I enjoyed the end of the video the most. It’s easy for me, and I’m sure other Y Generation-ers, to take the Internet for granted. I have never really thought about the Internet in terms of ethics, but the part where “rethink _____” kept appearing made a connection for me. The Internet is definitely a double edged sword, and it’s easy for most people to approach it with a detached-nothing-bad-can-happen mindset.